A patient walks into the proctologists office for his appointment. The doctor greets the man and then begins the check up. The proctologist asks the patient a few questions about his condition and takes some notes as he explains. After a short while the doctor stops writing. This troubles the patient, so he asks, "Doc, is something the matter?" The proctologist holds up an anal thermometer and exclaims, "Damn, some asshole has my pen!"